WW: Noodles
June 17, 2009 | 2 Comments
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Babies and Buddies: Do They Mix?
June 16, 2009 | 4 Comments
photo credit: Sellers Patton
Does a baby make it difficult to cultivate friendships?
In my opinion, yes.
At a time in a woman’s life where she really needs other women, it’s often quite isolating when you have a new infant.
A reader wrote:
“My biggest challenge is probably developing friendships and nurturing relationships. I moved to a new city just after I found out I was pregnant. My son is now nine months, and I’ve yet to really connect into a friendship.
There’s a group of mamas who get together weekly to accomplish tasks that can easily get neglected being home alone with a kid- special meals, gardening, detailed cleaning, etc. The ladies are lovely, and so are their kids. But I find the scenario too hectic. It’s almost impossible to complete a thought, much less a sentence.
While it’s fun, I’m not really getting a strong friendship out of it. Just some social time. I thought that a baby would give more depth to potential friendships, but am finding it’s not the case for me.
I don’t feel particularly lonely, but don’t want my husband to be my one and only confidante.
I have a feeling that my son is really benefiting from our days together, mostly alone. We go to the library and the park fairly often, so he’s not a shut-in. And he interacts very well with older kids and adults, but shows little interest in most babies his own age. I feel his social interaction is fine for this age. I am confident that our concentrated time together is great for now, and as he gets older and less dependent on me, we’ll both have more friends.”
I can understand her feelings completely.
When my oldest was a baby, I often went to La Leche League meetings 3 times a month (3 different groups!) just for the social interaction. But it was very difficult to have a real conversation with all that was going on.
It does get easier. As the little ones grow up and leave your lap to explore, they free you up to engage more with other people.
Although I still have a difficult time having a phone conversation with my kids around!
How did you deal with this issue when your babies were little - or if your babies are still new?
PR: Holistic Moms Network Announces Conference
June 11, 2009 | Leave a Comment
Holistic Moms Network is another amazing organization to help moms find their tribe. I interviewed Nancy Massotto, their executive director, a couple of years ago on the show. That interview is no longer available but I highly recommend you find the group in your area if you want to find likeminded parents.
PRACTICAL TIPS FOR PARENTS: GOING GREEN AND RAISING POSITIVE KIDS
Holistic Moms Network Announces October Conference
Caldwell, NJ - Parenting is always challenging but trying to raise green and healthy kids can 09 Keynotes Smalloften feel overwhelming. That doesn’t have to be the case says green lifestyle expert, TV personality, and author Sara Snow. In her new book, Sara Snow’s Fresh Living, she lays out simple, practical steps that “will inspire changes in your life, just a few at a time, so that you are not overwhelmed by a need to change everything at once.”
“Parents do not wake up one morning and radically alter their lifestyle to greener, more sustainable choices,” says Holistic Moms Network Executive Director Nancy Massotto. “Rather, becoming a holistic parent is a journey that we take one step at time.” Parents might start in the kitchen, seeking out organic foods, taking advantage of local farmers markets, or learning about fair trade products. The impact of each of these options not only hits home, but also affects our ecological footprint, according to Ms. Snow.
Whether you want to reduce the toxins on your food, in your home, or on the planet, you will find simple, practical ways to make Small Changes to Save a Big Planet in Sara Snow’s Keynote presentation at the 2009 Natural Living Conference on Saturday, October 17 in Basking Ridge, New Jersey. The Conference will also feature parenting expert and author Naomi Aldort, Ph.D., presenting Babies Through Teens: Having a Child Who Behaves Well of Her Own Free Will, as well as Workshop Sessions on improving school lunch programs, plant-based diets for health, vaccination choice, and the power of positive affirmations.
Those in attendance will also enjoy a Holistic Living Exhibit Hall featuring the goods and services of businesses supporting natural living, displays from Holistic Moms Network Sponsors including Mothering Magazine and Organic Valley, book signings with the Keynote Speakers, a Silent Auction of green and healthy products and services to benefit the Holistic Moms Network, and a healthy lunch.
Space is limited and early registration is strongly recommended. Early registration is open to the public and is available through August 31, 2009. Member registration is $75 per person, $90 for non-members. Late registration, from September 1, 2009 through October 9, 2009 (space permitting), will be $85 for members, $100 for non-members. For details visit http://annualconference.holisticmoms.org or call (877) HOL-MOMS. Online registration is available and exhibitor and advertiser information can also be downloaded from the website.
About the Holistic Moms Network
The Holistic Moms Network is a national, membership-based and managed, non-profit organization with more than 100 chapters across the US and Canada. The organization is headquartered in Caldwell, New Jersey and launched its first chapter in 2002 in Essex County, NJ. The purpose of the Holistic Moms Network is to provide awareness, education, and support for holistic parenting and to offer a nurturing, open-minded and respectful community for parents to share these ideals. Members’ interests include: natural health and wellness, nutrition and organic whole foods, integrative/alternative medicine, natural childbirth and breastfeeding, positive parenting, and non-toxic, eco-friendly living. Members can participate in educational meetings, local playgroups, and social events in local chapters across the North America. For more information, please visit: www.holisticmoms.org or contact Executive Director, Nancy Massotto, at 973.228.2110.
Pray for Parenting
June 10, 2009 | 3 Comments
photo credit: ivoryelephantphotography
A reader named Rachel submitted this tip:
“The best parenting tip I have is to pray! It gives me more strength to get through my day with patience, love, and creativity.
It especially helps me to remember to discipline lovingly.”
Do you find that your spirituality or religious beliefs help you be a better parent?
WW: New Backyard
June 10, 2009 | 1 Comment
present
June 8, 2009 | 2 Comments
Why we should be more like children: Reason #1,287
This morning 3 year old Sadie excitedly grabs my hand, pulling me out of my cozy chair where I was sipping my first (and unfinished) cup of hot coffee.
“I wanna show you somfin!”
We walk towards the kitchen where she has strategically placed not one but two chairs, enabling her to reach a tall cupboard where I had (at least, up until now) hidden a bag of toys and gifts for the children.
“Look mommy! Get it down! That blue bag! It can be a present for me.”
It can be a present for me.
What would life be like as an adult if we went after what we wanted like that - totally confident that other people we love would be just as excited as we are about helping us get it?
It can be a present for me.
How To Prevent Behavior Problems
June 6, 2009 | Leave a Comment
None of us wants to punish when we can prevent. When I got this article, I thought it had some great tips and decided to publish it here. Several of these points I’ve also written about, and I linked to those posts in the article.
12 Ways to Prevent Behavior Problems Before They Start
1. Don’t hit. Teach gentle hands by using gentle hands.
2. Recognize and respect that you child has his own unique perspective, needs, and desires
3. Find a way to say YES. Think carefully about your reasons for saying no. Control? Not wanting to deal? Think of the possibilities of saying yes to your child. Yes, you can wear socks that don’t match; yes, you can have a friend over; yes, I’ll play with you when I’m finished with the dishes.
4. Tell your child what he can do. Dogs are for petting. Balls are for throwing. Food is for eating. Mommy is for cuddling. Teethers are for biting.
5. Take care of yourself and know your triggers and needs. When are you most likely to react? How can you shift your perspective?
6. Strive for a balanced lifestyle—rest, nourishment, fun, exercise
7. Choose quality child care. Whether for an hour a week or for eight hours a day, the quality of child care matters.
8. Teach your child to take a break and breathe deeply.
9. Provide ways for your child to feel and release intense emotions like jumping up and down, hitting pillows, or pounding the bed.
10. Offer controlled choices when necessary—you can play for 0, 1, or 2 more minutes! What’s your choice? Use a timer or clock.
11. Use water. When things are getting a little intense, try a bath for you, your child (or you and your child!). Fillthe sink, a bucket, or a water table and allow your child to play or “wash” dishes or toys.
12. Become a more sensitive, responsive parent or caregiver. Get READY.
Summertime
June 3, 2009 | 1 Comment
It’s official.
Summer is here.
The kids are out of school.
(If you’re new here, I recently enrolled my kids in public school. They had been homeschooled all their lives.) I was pleased that when the school year ended, the kids were sent hom with assessments and even school books - as a homeschooling mom, we learned every day, all year long. The kids are doing schoolwork without me even asking them to.
The swimming lessons began Monday.
I only signed up the 3 older kids because of the height requirement, but Sadie used her charms on the instructors and each day they’ve pulled her into the pool with the others.
I really wish I had done this years ago.
My boys are intimidated by the water and started to complain a little today. It’s not their first time swimming of course. Every summer we would hit the pool, the beach, etc. It’s just that they were never formally taught to swim. The girls are much more fearless, probably because they’re younger.
The annual run to Old Navy for flip flops has been accomplished.
My shoulders are a bit burned.
I never laid in the sun as a teen but last Sunday it was so gorgeous out, I decided to sit and read in my backyard. Nothing too bad, but I’ll be more careful next
time. It feels so good to soak up the sun after a month of having mostly rain here in Atlanta.
I have discovered Edy’s Lime popsicles and they rock my world.
(In a pinch, I have thrown one into the blender with a little triple sec and tequila and it makes a darn good margarita!)
What are you up to?
WW: Gardening Is Hard Work
June 3, 2009 | 1 Comment
Commenting on Other’s Appearance
June 2, 2009 | 9 Comments
I have a question for my wise and wonderful readers.
Is it a no-no to make comments about a child’s physical appearance?
What if the comments are negative?
What if they’re positive?
What if the child is male?
What if the child is female?
Does that make a difference (on either count)?
I find myself telling my sons rarely that they’re handsome. Perhaps they’re dressed up for worship, or for a special occasion. Or maybe they just had their hair “did” and I want them to know I like the new cut.
But I find myself commenting far MORE often on my daughter’s appearance.
Even when I try not to. It just comes out sometimes. I tell them they’re pretty, beautiful, their hair looks pretty, their dress is pretty….
Am I a product of my culture, that has different expectations of men and women?
Or is it the children themselves who bring this out in me?
The boys are picky about their hair, but the girls?
They stay in my makeup.
If I tell them they don’t need it, they say:
“But I want to look pretty.”
Or worse (the 3 year old says this!),
“But I don’t look pretty (without it).”
Should a parent refrain from making these remarks?
I know one thing. I don’t like it when anyone refers to my 6 year old daughter’s size. She is bigger than her sister, but she is not overweight.
She’s a big, beautiful little frau. She’ll probably always be bigger than her sister. (Think legs like Courtney Love, not Teri Hatcher.)
Personally, I refrain from making comments about other’s appearance. I don’t refer to people as fat, thin, ugly, pretty, bald, hairy, what have you…. I think it’s in poor taste and just plain bad manners.
I don’t want my kids thinking it matters too much.
