When she walked into the x-ray room and was asked to hop up in that huge chair with all that strange alien equipment around her, she looked a little nervous.

Mommy couldn’t go into the room because I’m pregnant.

So big sister immediately volunteered to go in with her.

And hold her hand. And her teddy too.

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I’ve typically avoided the topic of marriage on this blog. For almost 3 years I blogged here as a single mom. My marriage ended after 12 years. What the heck do I know? I didn’t want to seem like a hypocrite.

But after a long time of reflection and self examination, I’ve come to know that there really isn’t anything I could have done to prevent the end of my first marriage. My ex husband and I have a pretty good relationship now as co-parents, and I’m proud of that. I think we’ve both learned a lot and grown as people. While I still grieve for the loss of my first family and wish my kids weren’t children of divorce, I think we’ve done about as good as two people can since the divorce.

This week Sheila asked women to write about what they wish they had known as new brides. Since I’ve only been married to my current husband for less than 7 months, we’re still in that awkward newlywed phase. I’m eager for the first couple of years to be over. This time is fun but somewhat difficult as you get to know each other.

Still, I’ve been a married woman since I was 19 years old. I’ve learned a lot about men and marriage in general. Here are my thoughts:

What I Wish I Had Known About Men and Marriage Years Ago

#1 – I wish I had not taken his moods personally.

When my first husband came home from work in a foul mood, I wish I had shrugged that off. I’m able to do that now. Perhaps because I’m older, I’m able to give someone the space to have their feelings without getting sucked in? That takes emotional maturity and confidence. Sadly, I know people who have been married for decades who can’t do this very well. When one is in a low mood, they both are.

#2- I wish I had understood that good sex is a gift you give yourself.

It’s so easy to use kids/fatigue/hormones/body image issues etc as an excuse not to be intimate, but it’s a whole lot easier to put up with his personality quirks and weaknesses when you’re having lots of orgasms!

The other day a friend confided in me that despite loving her husband deeply and enjoying sex when they have it, she has no libido. Two two babies one right after another and gaining a lot of weight, not getting enough sleep and all that may very well play a role in her desire, but still…

My advice was:  “Do it anyway.” After all, we cook dinner for our children even when we’re tired or “don’t feel like it”, right? If your husband doesn’t do what you want all the time or is clueless about your feelings, you still deserve YOUR “due”. Don’t let petty annoyances deprive you of the feel good stuff that will make your relationship run more smoothly outside the bedroom.

And if your husband is selfish or has no clue that your body works differently from his, don’t blame him – SHOW him what you need. I don’t think there is a man alive who will be offended!

#3 – Marriage doesn’t make you happy

Whoa. This is a big one, and many happily married people may disagree with me, but I do not believe marriage makes you happy. Even the scriptures say that people who marriage will have “tribulation in their flesh” and the apostle Paul stated that “you’re better off as you are” (single).

Happy people are happy, period. It’s a habit, not a situation. A man won’t “make” you happy. If you’re looking for that, you’ll be miserable in your relationship.  Every time he does or says something thoughtless (see #1), your “happiness” flies out the window. It’s a terrible burden to bear, that of making someone else happy.

The answer? Make yourself happy. I don’t mean being selfish. A good marriage requires unselfishness. But in my life I’ve learned that the moment I start blaming the other person for my unhappiness, I’m way off.

But, when I start doing the things I need to do in order to be happy (exercise, eating right, spending time with people I love, writing, meeting goals, focusing on my relationship with my creator, etc) then my relationship magically improves!

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As I’ve mentioned several times before, I’m a long time member of Mom Masterminds.

Mom Masterminds is the only networking, learning, coaching, accountability and mentoring forum I know of just for work at home moms who are serious about making their business a success.

(And by the way, if you have a mom blog that you monetize, you have a business.)

Recently Kelly McCausey began publishing a monthly newsletter for members. This month she made the “MMMotivator” available for the general public.

You can download your copy here:

Mom Masterminds Mmotivator

Enjoy reading!

And if you’re interested in seeing what MM is all about, check out the free trial membership here.

Speaking of WAHMs, if you’re a Virtual Assistant or would like to know more about the techy nuts and bolts of setting up a Wordpress blog, visit my other blog for a free downloadable checklist!

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The Green Year: 365 Small Things You Can Do to Make a Big Difference is a book that can ease your eco-conscience and get you on the right track.

It feels good to make changes towards a more sustainable lifestyle, but when we’re already feeling overwhelmed and tired, our best intentions get thrown by the wayside. Enter The Green Year (following this link takes you to Amazon, where you can pick up a copy for under $2!).

Every single day of the year there is a short, do-able tip that you can implement. Yep, 365 in all. Each takes a moment to read (great for us busy moms who don’t have as much time for reading as we wish we had) and offers a simple activity that will cut the energy your family consumes, save you money, and reduce waste.

Today’s tip, for example, was:  Recycle Your Telephone Books. (And call your telephone company to stop delivery.)

Also convenient is the space at the bottom of each page for your own notes. If the idea on the page doesn’t work for you, simply write in something that will. There’s also a nifty check button for you to mark when the idea is “done”. If one step a day is too much, you can go through the book more than once, and use this to keep track of the ideas you’ve already worked on or made into habits.

I’ll be having the author of The Green Year, Jodi Helmer, as a guest on the shop soon, so stay tuned for that.  Here’s that Amazon link again:

The Green Year: 365 Small Things You Can Do to Make a Big Difference

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After some research I still haven’t decided whether MSG is truly evil, but I do my best to avoid processed foods just to be on the safe side. Even organic and natural foods that are processed at high temperatures (canned soups, boxed goods etc) contain glutamates – whether artificial or naturally occurring.

Dear EarthTalk:

I see a lot of “healthy snacks” being marketed for kids that list “natural flavors” but don’t identify them. Should I use these products?

– John Stein, Methuen, MA

Beloved food writer Michael Pollan recommends steering clear of foods that advertise their green attributes on their label.

According to his line of reasoning, why give a child a fruit roll-up when you can give him or her a piece of fruit?

Only processed foods need to advertise what’s natural about them, whereas an apple speaks for itself, providing wholesome nutrition without the need for marketing hype.

But most of us depend on the occasional packaged or processed food, so choosing between the lesser of two evils sometimes has to be the way to go.

If a product lists natural ingredients on its label—anything from real fruits, vegetables and nuts to cereals, grains and other healthy foods you can recognize without a food dictionary on hand—it’s probably better than a food reliant on artificial flavors and sweeteners.

“One way for your kids to enjoy healthy snacks is to get them started on naturally sweet foods,” says Christine Steendahl of Kid Approved Meals, which sells menus and shopping lists to parents looking for guidance in meal preparation. “Since most kids crave sweets…naturally sweet foods such as fruits are perfect,” she says. Real bananas, oranges, apples, cherries, strawberries and other fruits are popular with most kids. “You can mix in yogurt or even make a fruit smoothie with some milk and a drop of chocolate or other natural flavors,” Steendahl suggests.

(Note from Carrie:  Christine Steendahl is also the mom behind Dine Without Whine and Menu Planning Central.)

“One thing to recognize about children is that if they try enough types of natural and healthy snacks, they will find one that they enjoy,” says Steendahl. “The problem is that many times parents give up trying to find the snacks that their kids like and settle for popular junk foods instead.” She stresses the importance of teaching kids which snacks to eat and which to avoid early in life so that they can sidestep obesity problems altogether. Nuts and dry cereals, for example, are good alternatives to chips and other junk food.

According to California-based pediatrician and author William Sears, who markets his own line of healthy kids snacks called Lunchbox Essentials, parents should make sure that any snack foods they give their family members provide both fiber and protein, which give the feeling of fullness, and taste good as well. He adds that parents should learn to read labels so they can tell which products contain hydrogenated oils, artificial colors, preservatives and high-fructose corn syrup—all of which should be avoided.

As a last resort for especially finicky kids, parents can find packaged snacks that might look like junk food but are actually healthy and nutritious, including certain brands of fruit roll-ups and granola bars. Look in the snack aisle of your local natural foods market for such items, and don’t be afraid to ask store personnel for recommendations. It’s important to take your child’s nutrition seriously. Whether he or she ever realizes it, you are setting patterns that will enable them to live healthier and longer lives.

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photo credit: whgrad

A reader had this question so I am publishing it here to get the wisdom and advice of other homeschooling moms:

“Hi. My son 8 year old son is recently homeschooled – he’s currently finishing up the 2nd grade. He was a good student in public school and his teachers loved him. We have an “eclectic” and relaxed homeschool style so I am no hardnose, but even still I have trouble getting him to do any schoolwork. He says he doesn’t like to read.

Math is “sort of” ok with him, and he likes to do hands on things like take apart gadgets, draw diagrams, work with electronics, color, draw and write stories. He is very intelligent but not especially gifted verbally. He seems to have a real knack for building and fixing things (working with wood, playing Lego). He also loves computers.

I realize that he may never be a big reader and don’t want to push him, but some reading is of course necessary. I need some suggestions on how to engage him in a way that works with his learning style. (By the way I am divorced so I can’t fully embrace unschooling, his father is critical of that and I have to be accountable to him as part of our parenting plan.)

Would you publish this on your blog so I can see how other homeschoolers have handled this?

Thanks!”

Do you have any advice for this mom? I’m curious if there is a homeschool curriculum available that caters to kids like this…?

Please leave them in the comments.

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She is a mom of 3 little ones and the owner of an online advocacy site, community and resource site for mothers called Empowered Mommies.

Ivanna shares her vision with us of what an empowered mom looks like and how she hopes to provide support to moms who want to make the best decisions for their families.

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Case in point, today he began throwing up and having diarrhea. Evidently it’s going around?

I offer him some homeopathic Ipecac.

“No. I would rather my immune system take care of it.”

“Honey, it’s harmless. Homeopathics support your immune system. It won’t hurt you.”

“No.”

Clamps hand over mouth.

Sigh.

Apparently he was listening all those times I talked about the evils of pharmaceuticals and Big Pharma.

A few minutes later after referring to my trusty Smart Medicine for a Healthier Child, I tell him I’ll be giving him some acidophilus later.

“NO! I don’t want anything killing off my healthy bacteria!”

“Sweetie, acidophilus IS the healthy bacteria. You’re thinking of antibiotics. See? It says it right here in the book…”

photo credit: freeparking

I take him a small glass of water and suggest he take small sips, not gulps.

I’m surprised when this doesn’t lead to an argument about fluoride and estrogen in the water supply.

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1. MOE’S Southwest Grill. Let’s get food right out of the way since it’s SO very important to me at the moment, umkay? If this little one is a boy I might have to name him Moe because I cannot seem to get enough of their steak Overachiever tacos. The perfect combo of tastes to please the pregnant palate: crunch, protein, guac! and vinegary tomatillo salsa. Yum
2. Green Olives. Straight outta the jar.
   
3. Cinnamon Calli tea. The only thing I’ve found to ease my nausea a bit.
4. My Old Navy maternity under the belly skinny jeans. These make me feel like some parts of me are semi-normal still.
5. The BabyCenter.com emails that keep me updated on baby’s size and development each week. Also sweet to forward to Big Z.
6. Target’s maternity clearance rack, where I’ve snagged shirts for $2.
7. My BeBand that kept me in my pre-preggers jeans for several weeks past their unbottoned capacity. I’ve even used it as a comfy bra under dresses that are too low cut. I also plan on using it to hold my pants together postpartum before I’m able to button them.
8. Big Z. For putting 5 kids to bed every night by himself while I try to sleep off nausea.
9. Sweet children who are tiptoe around and are extra nice to me and each other after they hear me vomiting in the bathroom.  Also Sadie and Ilana lifting my shirt to kiss my belly and say, “Hi baby, I love you!”
10. My Floradix. My iron has been low this pregnancy so I started taking this stuff. It doesn’t make me sick and cause constipation like other iron supplements. Also doesn’t taste half bad!

    photo credit: Bludgeoner86

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Is it possible to eliminate the need for glasses and improve and prevent eye diseases? Have you ever wondered if eyeglasses actually accelerate the degeneration of your eyes? Listen in and find out!

Learn more about Dr. Banker’s Home Study Vision Improvement Kit here.

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You see, I only take my kids to the Doctor when they’re sick and I’m unsure of the diagnosis or am concerned that it’s more serious than what I can handle and treat at home.

Which ends up being about every 5 years or so.

Apparently Pediatricians like to see the wee ones more often than that. Who knew?

Seriously though, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it right?

My youngest has only been to the Doctor twice in her 4 years. Once was when she was a week old for a comprehensive newborn exam. The next time was when she had an infected hangnail that wasn’t responding to home remedies and was painful to touch.

Yesterday the occasion was a little check up for Julien. It all started with a visit to the Dentist. During the exam, he asked me if Julien had ever suffered from reflux.

“No, why?”

“He has some unusual wear on his back teeth that isn’t indicative of bruxism but looks more like that of a child with reflux. Does he ever have hot burps?”

Stifling a laugh, I respond that he has never complained of any symptoms.

“It could be that he had it in the past. Just mention it to his pediatrician next time you see him.”

I’ve noticed a couple of things with Julien that concerned me and wasn’t sure if they were related, but reflux might fit the picture. And since he hasn’t seen the pediatrician in a few years, I decided to make him an appointment.

After looking over Julien’s chart, the Doctor immediately starts in on me.

“I not see dis child for 4 years. How I know if his growth eez normal? What about his yearly FEE-zee-cul?”

(You see, pediatrician is from Israel and has a cute accent. Also bears resemblance to Omar Sharif. With a little Raffi too. Who I also had a wee crush on. Which is the real reason I endure this.)

After looking in Julien’s mouth and ears he asks me one question:

“Does he have odor from zee mouth?”

Uh-oh. Yes, I am now admitting to the world wide internets that my beautiful sweet darling boy has stinky breath. All the time. Even after brushing, flossing and tongue cleaning. This is one of those little things I was concerned about.

When I admitted this to the good Doc, he made an immediate recommendation.

“Get him some Act-EEE-vee-ya. You know dis Act-EEE-vee-ya? One a day, in zee morning. He needs bac-TEER-e-yas. Act-EEE-vee-ya has zee good bac-TEER-e-yas. Also, Tag.a.met. 150 milligrams, for two weekz.”

photo Wikipedia

Sigh. I’m not unhappy about the Activia with the good bacterias, but I’m not so happy about the Tagamet.

After all, he hasn’t done any tests to confirm the diagnosis. Is this one of those Dr. House-ish moves where you give the patient the drugs and if they get better, you confirm what you thought was wrong with them?

“So you think he has reflux?”

“No. You need make appointment for FEE-zee-cul so I can run some tests.”

“So why are we giving him Tagamet when we aren’t sure he has reflux?”

(Doctors just love it when you challenge them like this.)

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Interestingly, in my days as a single mom of 4, I kept on top of laundry doing one load a day. As long as I did that, laundry never got overwhelming. During some of that time, I didn’t own a dryer and hung all the laundry outside or inside on a drying rack.

When I found myself in a house without a washing machine, I did the coin laundry thing for awhile. (Surprisingly, I didn’t mind this at all. Every week, armed with about $8 in quarters and two hours, I got ALL the laundry washed, dryed and folded in one fell swoop.)

Back to my laundry management system before August 24, 2009.

Part of the reason for my success with “one load a day” despite having 4 kids was because I had instilled good laundry habits in my young’uns.  I trained them to wear their jeans two or three times, until they actually looked or smelled dirty.  I strongly discouraged changing outfits multiple times a day and made sure items were actually dirty before I washed them.

They also had modest wardrobes. Everyone looked good, but their dressers and closets weren’t stuffed to the gills by any means. I found that I could even get away with not sorting (since I almost never use bleach and most of their clothing was purchased used, so nothing was going to bleed). I washed boy’s laundry on one day, girls on the other. That cut down on the footwork too (since the kids were roomies).

Enter new hubs and a 10 year old step daughter, aka Big Z and Little Z (Zeke and Zoe).

Of course, I love them dearly and wouldn’t trade them for all the Soap Nuts in the world…

but suddenly I found myself doing FOUR loads a day just to keep up, much less put a dent in the piles!

I spoke to Big Z about this phenomenon (also throwing in how much I previously earned per hour as an internet marketing coach to moms and a freelance writer, teehee) and we came up with some solutions. (Well actually I came up with solutions but Big Z wielded the power tools and did the heavy lifting. Gotta love that!)

Before I unveil my new “Large Family Laundry Solution”, I’ll talk a bit about why my laundry duties quadrupled overnight and what my laundry routine of recent months has looked like.

I’ll call this the BEFORE.

(I do wish I had actually taken a picture of the monstrosity that was the “BEFORE” with its mountain of laundry all over the basement floor but alas, I didn’t. I promise nice shiny pics of the “AFTER” shortly, when I do the B portion of this post.)

Bad Laundry Habits

Let me now refer to some of the habits that create needless laundry work. The first of which is :

Bogus Laundry

Bogus laundry is clothing that isn’t actually dirty, but which is mindlessly tossed into the hamper, where the Laundry Fairy/Angel (aka Mom) magically takes care of it. A few examples:

• Bogus laundry include jeans that are worn for a couple of hours that still look and smell clean.
• Socks that were never worn but which fell on the floor because the owner didn’t put them away in a timely manner.
• My personal favorite, towels that are used to blot a CLEAN body dry after a shower, which are then tossed still damp into the hamper. Ugh! (Please tell me I’m not the only person in America who thinks it’s perfectly sanitary to use a bath towel several times?)
• Doll clothes. Double ugh.
• Suits and dresses that are worn for two hours while a child sits still in a place of worship. They ain’t dirty either.

See what I mean? All this bogus laundry was adding up to huge work (and a wee touch of resentment) for mama.

Another bad laundry habit?

Too Much Clothing

Let’s be honest. Most of us wear about 20% of our clothing 80% of the time. Why not get rid of the clutter? All it does it spill out of jammed dresser drawers and make things fall off hangers in closets (creating more bogus laundry!).

When I moved into Big Z’s house, I tactfully suggested that he toss some of the threadbare T-shirts he had been collecting since the late 80’s. Since we were moving and having to pack up this stuff anyway, he obliged. We ended up with FOUR large black trash bags full. Ahem.

My stepdaughter’s closet had enough short sleeved t-shirts in it to outfit a small orphanage. She admitted that she didn’t like or wear most of them, so it was toss! toss! pack into storage for her new younger stepsister! She was thrilled to create tons of new space in her closet.

Another factor is my husband changing clothing several times a day. First he takes off his t shirt and PJ bottoms and tosses them into the hamper (wrong, PJs can be worn several times!), then puts on work clothes which of course get nasty with furniture repair goo, then changes into exercise clothing that get sweaty and smelly, then back into PJs… not sure what to do about all these wardrobe changes!

My laundry “routine” also brought me frustration.

My washer and dryer are located downstairs in the basement. Good because of the space to move around. Bad because I was hauling laundry baskets up the stairs. Then I folded it in little stacks around the living room. Then I asked various children to put their stack away.

The end result was that I had multiple little laundry piles for each load creating visual clutter in my living room while I waited for kids to obey or reminded them over and over.

No good.

The new system is much better.  It saves me time, labor and creates no clutter.

More on that later!

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The snow was so thick and powdery, it could be rolled up in big thick sheets like insulation. I could hardly  believe my eyes!

The kids built a ginormous snowman about 5 feet tall. This is really unbelievable for Georgia.

Before building the snowman though, the kids first jumped into the huge piles of snow.

My goal for this “snowed in” weekend was to finish ALL the laundry.

Ha! Fat chance. With all the wet pants, gloves and socks… I doubt it’s going to happen!

Speaking of laundry strategies for the large family, I tweeted and asked for tips yesterday. 

If you have any time or labor saving advice to share, please reply to my Twitter stream or leave a comment below.

Thanks again!

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Oddly,  I had no plans to go. But hearing all the tweeting and thinking of how I missed seeing some of my favorite mom bloggers, I felt a twinge.

I have been feeling too horrible to do any traveling, but it’s on my agenda for next year. If you were in attendance, I would love to read your recap posts!

Please link to them in the comments. Thanks!

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/whine

… thank goodness when Mom can’t come to the phone, I still have my blog.

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Unfortunately, I can’t give this product a glowing review.

I was excited about using an all natural, vegetable based dye to (hopefully) cover the grey roots that have been growing since my pregnancy began, but it didn’t do that so well.

To be fair, grey hair is notoriously resistant to color and even conventional semi and demi permanent hair colors often don’t color it sufficiently.  It may just not be possible to color grey without chemicals.

If you search the internet you’ll find some really horrible reviews of this product. My thoughts are far less extreme either way so I’ll do a quick list of pros and cons:

PROS:

• The product is a natural, vegetable based dye and therefore has no PPD (short for paraphenylene-diamine, which I mention here in another article about natural hair dye). It also contains no ammonia or peroxide (so it cannot lighten, only darken your current hair color).
• It has a fresh, pleasant smell. When my oldest son walked in the room he said “something smells like cherries”.

CONS:

• The product was a little more complicated to apply. It’s a two step process and also requires the application of heat (basically you use a blow dryer to apply heat for 5 minutes on, 5 minutes off until you rinse). That wasn’t a super big deal, but the product is a little runny so it’s hard to keep it off your scalp, which leads to the second problem.
• The dye was very difficult to rinse off. I rinsed my hair 3 times but it still felt a little “muddy” with the product. Even now after several shampoos, dye comes off on my hands if I run them through my hair. The included “stain guard” did effectively remove stains from the sink at least.

That last issue is evidently par for the course for vegetable dyes. In fact today I got my hair cut and explained to the hair dresser what was happening. She said that was typical. “We use vegetable dyes here all the time and that’s just what they do, the pigments are just really strong.”

My hair doesn’t feel at all damaged or dried out. It feels soft and looks shiny so I’m pretty confident it wasn’t harmed by the process.

My final take?

I would recommend this product for people who have medium to dark hair (that is more forgiving of color mishaps) and wanted to go a bit darker, but not if I had grey hair I wanted to color.

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Yesterday I got my first batch of cloth diapers in the mail. I’ve enjoyed fondling them ever since.

You mean I have to wait 6 months before I get to actually USE them?

As a self-confessed cloth diaper addict, I can scarcely wait to diaper a baby bum in these. It’s one of the fun things about new babies – perusing the different brands, deciding on your cloth diaper “system”, buying, washing and stacking your diapers in anticipation of baby’s arrival.

Frugal mommies who are using disposables become geniuses at combining store specials with coupons and rebates to get their baby’s ’sposies dirt cheap – but what’s a cheapskate cloth diapering mommy to do?

Affording Cloth Diapers: How to build your cloth diaper stash

The most affordable cloth diapers are almost always going to be Chinese Prefolds. These are the workhorse diaper. Absorbent, they are easy to wash and they dry quickly.

Generally prefolds $1-2 apiece for the good ones, and you can often find imperfect “Seconds” on Amazon and eBay. Or, you can buy them used. Keep in mind that you get what you pay for. Cheap quality diapers typically found in discount stores are thin and not very absorbent, plus they’re often not even 100% cotton.

Prefolds are awesome for their adaptability too. You can fold them in different ways for boys and girls and use two in one diaper cover for nighttime. If baby has a rash, a loosely pinned on prefold will provide some protection while letting lots of air flow around to allow his skin to heal.

But, if you’re interested in trying some of the new, fancy schmancy Cadillac cloth diapers (or just want to keep a few of those around for Dads, Grandparents or babysitters who may not “get” cloth … or for travel), here are a few suggestions on affording them if you’re on a tight budget.

(There is another article here on affordable cloth diapers for your reading pleasure.)

Baby Shower Registry

Nowadays, dozens of natural baby online shops are offering baby registries. Search around to see if your favorite site offers one.

Personally I always found it very difficult to register at a typical discount store like Target and the like, because I don’t use so many conventional baby products that these stores sell.

But a lot of your friends and relatives will love the convenience of a baby registry. They know they’re getting you what you like and what you really need.

Amazon’s Wish List is another great option.

Simply browse to items you want and click “add to wish list”. If you have an Amazon account, you have a wish list by default. If you want to create a new one, it’s super simple to do. Tell your friends you’re “registered” at Amazon when they ask!

Once A Month Diaper

Try investing in just two or three diapers a month during your pregnancy. If your budget is tight you can probably still reallocate some funds to the tune of $20-$30 a month. 

By the end of 9 months you should have a couple dozen, which if you wash often, could suffice, especially if you purchase “One Size” diapers.

Used

Back in the good old days (when my oldest was a baby), I could find nice used cloth diapers at thrift stores – it’s been years since this has been the case however. My thought is that most moms who are getting rid of their stash just sell them on eBay instead.

But, it’s still worth looking around – especially at consignment sales. Of course eBay and sites like DiaperSwappers are also great for finding used cloth diapers. If the idea of “used” cloth is too much for your squeamishness level, keep in mind that many moms will sell new diapers that their baby has outgrown or that do not fit their baby’s shape well, or that they flat out do not like. Some of these have been washed not worn, and some have never been worn. It’s worth a look.

So. How did YOU build your cloth diaper stash on the cheap?

Please share your tips in the comments!

photo credit: mikeporcenaluk

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While it sounds complicated, “executive functioning” basically refers to kids with weaknesses in planning and organization. These kids face all kinds of challenges–at school, in sports, in the family, and among their peers.

Do these traits sound familiar?

:  Your child often forgets to turn in assignments at school.

:  S/he arrives at important places unprepared.

: Underestimates the effort involved in projects, has trouble getting started.

: Has trouble organizing space.

Dr. Cooper-Kahn is a clinical psychologist and learning specialist and offers tips for gently parenting a disorganized child.

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Laurel’s topic is how babywearing can make life with littles a whole lot easier – especially when traveling and visiting relatives, such as around the holiday season.

Laurel contributed an article with more tips on holiday babywearing that you can read here.

Read Carrie’s reviews of two of her favorite baby slings: the Maya Wrap and the Moby Wrap

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“Dear Ms. Lauth,

Ms. Ocean asked me to bring in pizza today to recognize students that have been demonstrating role model behavior.  Julien was one of the ones she selected.  There were 7 kids…they were very proud of themselves.”

Ms. Ocean’s Room Mom

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I was pleasantly surprised to find a warning against phthalates in a recent magazine I subscribe to (it was Fit Pregnancy which I consider to be pretty mainstream).

The last time I was pregnant that information was hardly on the radar for most mainstream media.

Phthalates are an ingredient found in many skin care products such as lotions, shampoos and nail polish. It may or may not be on the label and may fall under the umbrella “fragrance”.

What I find so interesting is the typical pregnant woman’s response to such “fragrance”.

Personally, the smell of any conventional shampoo and soap make me overwhelmed with nausea and I begin to gag. I wonder if this isn’t a protective response? (Burt’s Bees shampoo I am tolerating just fine. It’s also phtalate free.)

Now that I’m expecting again, I’m getting picky about my skin care. I had let some items with parabens sneak into my bathrooms. These have to go.

What did you use on your skin when you’re pregnant that’s nontoxic and safe?

Skin care is a bit tricky during pregnancy. On the one hand you may have rashes and itching due to increased sensitivity, but also be experiencing breakouts.

My favorite “go to” product is coconut oil. It seems you can’t get much better than coconut oil as a safe skin care product when you’re pregnant.

It’s great as a face and body moisturizer and hair conditioner, as a spot treatment for pimples – you can even use it as an *ahem* personal lubricant. (And since it’s antifungal, that can only be good for the nether regions and those sneaky yeast infections that can crop up when you’re pregnant – thanks to the extra estrogen.)

I’m also liking Belli All Day Moisture Lotion. It does have a mild lemon scent that comes from lemon oil, not synthetic fragrance, and it’s paraben and phtalate free and doesn’t bother my sensitive nose.

photo credit: Vivian Chen [陳培雯]

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My guest this week is ChicagoHealers.com Practitioner Dr. Raymond Hatland, DDS

We’re talking about bottled versus tap water. In our modern age with its focus on convenience, bottled water has become extremely popular. But the plastic bottles are also spawning  massive amounts of trash. The debate between whether or not bottled water or tap water is better to drink has recently become a hot topic for discussion.

Dr. Hatland breaks down the pros and cons of bottled and tap water. Among them:

Bottled water may contain unacceptable levels of the plastic chemicals. i.e. Bpa. (Bisphenol-A) is made from a combination of phenol and acetone.

Bottled water usually has a very acidic pH – this can lead to more inflammation in the body, fluid retention etc. Tap water generally has a neutral or slightly alkaline pH.

If you opt for tap water, try an activated carbon filter with silver to reduce bacterial count as well as an alkalinizing unit.

Carrie recommends:

Kleen Kanteen stainless steel water bottles

photo credit: SuperFantastic

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“Hi, I enjoy your site and respect the views I have read in your articles. Thank you. I would consider myself an attachment-style parent. Extended breastfeeder, co-sleeper, natural birth, etc. all come natural to me.

I have two kids and recently have resorted to spanking and out-of-control behavior to discipline my 2 1/2 year old.

Now that I have stopped, I can hardly stand the guilt. It is almost unbearable.

I am the most optimistic and up-beat person I know and this makes me depressed, for the first time in my life. I know you are also busy with parenting issues, but I was hoping you had some words of wisdom to help me deal with this guilt.

My son’s aggressive behavior makes me feel so bad, knowing I have caused it. Thank you for listening.”

Honestly, I doubt there are any of us who haven’t made what we consider to be mistakes in our parenting journey. I know I have several regrets as a Mom. We all fail to live up to our own ideals at times. That’s because we’re human beings, and therefore imperfect.

I do know that prolonged guilt is destructive and counterproductive. But it’s not easy to get rid of it and forgive ourselves for our mistakes.

Do you have any advice or words of comfort for this mom?

photo credit: stofiska

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Everyone hates being told “I told you so”, and most women also hate thinking their mother was right.

However, on stepping upon the threshold of 30, and with my mother now in her early sixties, I can’t help but notice that on a good day, she looks not more than maybe only five or ten years older.

And with each wrinkle, thinned out skin or spot I notice, I hear her quite literally echoing voice telling me “I told you so”. So what was it exactly that she used to always harp on about while growing up?

Quite simply – endless beauty tips that at that time seemed to have been written on stone tablets alongside Moses’ 10 Commandments. But these then thought of as primitive beauty routines now seem charming and simple in an age where we’re constantly fed a barrage of beauty adverts and overly photo-shopped images of perfection.

In my own desperate attempt to look great, I have ventured down every possible winding road that ultimately lead me nowhere, and pick-pocketing my hard earned dollars with daylight robbery rates and empty promises of youth and beauty. I finally decided to throw in the towel and revert to the ‘old ways’ of doing things…

Best Kept Beauty Secrets

Face

* For smooth skin, crush four uncoated aspirins and mix 1 cup distilled water and ¼ cup apple cider vinegar. Use this 2-3 times a day for incredibly smooth skin and as an alternative to washing your face in the morning.

* If you have sensitive skin acne-prone, stay away from rich spicy foods, which only irritate and inflame your system.

* Sleep. Staying up too late or not getting enough sleep wreaks havoc on your skin, causing it to look dull, tired, and likely leading to breakouts.

* Use patchouli oil to quickly get rid of acne. Mix 10 drops of this strong smelling oil with 10 oz of almond oil as a nightly moisturizer and anti-wrinkle treatment. It’s got a potent smell; some people love it, others hate it, but it works like a charm.

Hair

* For soft hair, massage your scalp with coconut oil once a week, working it into your hair. Leave it in there for about 3 hours prior to washing it out with shampoo. Use just a dab of conditioner at the ends.

* For shiny hair, mix one egg (yolk and all) with a mashed up banana and apply it as a thick paste to your hair. Leave it on for 10-30 minutes, depending on your hair texture. Then, wash it out as usual and use conditioner only at the ends.

* For natural hair dye, use henna and add in a bit of lemon to the paste. Leave it in your hair for about 30 minutes to one hair for a natural reddish/auburn tint.

Body

* Use a mixture of pure olive oil with 1/2 parts sea salt as an in-shower body scrub. This combo completely eliminates the need for lotion and is great for winter weather.

* Make sure you get in some sort of physical activity. Our mothers and grandmothers stayed in shape with simple stretches, and not grueling hours at the gym. Try reaping the benefits of yoga as a way to maintain your girlish figure.

* Washing your hair with boiled rice water is also a great alternative for shiny hair.

The results of my little experiment and in following these tips have been absolutely smashing. I never looked better and the extra savings from not having to splurge on beauty products is the fondant on the cake.

Your Mother Was Right is written by freelance writer Shireen Qudosi. Follow her on Twitter @ShireenQ or email her at shireen.qudosi@hotmail.com

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I appreciate this guest post from Marie Ynami. Especially the point about telling a child exactly what a “clean room” means to you. When I created a simple checklist on an index card for my 8 year old, it made things much easier for him. I think most kids want their room to be tidy, but they become overwhelmed in the process. That’s easy enough to understand – we adults do the same thing!

If you are a parent, I’m sure you’ve heard your kids whine and complain when you ask them to clean up their room. The constant question is ” … but WHY, Mom? It looks fine!” Here are some answers that you can give them, the next time they ask why they have to clean up their room.

* It teaches them to be responsible. Knowing that they need to keep their room clean and tidy will instill some kind of responsibility in them. It will also help them appreciate and take care of the things they already own.

* It helps them to be prepared for the future. Admit it, they won’t live with you forever. Sometime in the future, they will have to move out and live on their own – they need to know how to do that and you are merely training them for this.

* Being a part of a family means that everyone needs to help out around the house – not only by keeping it clean and tidy but also with the other responsibilities like preparing meals, taking care of pets and other chores. Mainly though, they are responsible for keeping their personal space clean.

* When kids have a clean room with everything in a place of its own, they refrain from stepping on toys and breaking them. Not only will this keep their toys in good condition so they can be passed along in the future but it also avoids any situation where kids can hurt themselves.

* When you keep a room clean and organized, it is easier to find things that you need. If the room is messy and cluttered, they will have a hard time finding the toys they love to play with or homework and projects that need to be turned into school.

No one is born knowing how to clean; someone has to teach them. That’s one of the responsibilities of being a parent. We are the ones that will teach them well or not so well. What we teach them will carry through their entire lives.

An easy way to teach them is by having them help you when you clean. Start early to train your children to help with cleaning. This way, you will be less likely to have a problem when they get older. Of course, some children are messier than others, just be patient – just because they are messy doesn’t mean that they have to live in a pigsty.

Be certain that your children understand your definition of “clean”. For some, clean is a perfect room with nothing out of place. Some people see clean as not having to walk all over things on the floor. You decide how clean you want their room to be and ensure they understand what that is.

Sometimes, it is helpful to write a list of what you would like your child to do while they clean their room, for example:

- Put the clothes in the clothes hamper, hang them up, or put them in the dresser.
- Pick up the toys.
- Place books on the bookshelves.

Help your child figure out which of their items they can get rid of.

Ultimately, this is why its so important for children to clean their own rooms. They are learning how to prepare for the future, taking care of the things they have, and they are helping to maintain the home.

About the Author:

Marie Ynami loves to blog about topics that interest moms. You can find more of her blog posts at Mommy Community .

photo credit: Pink Sherbet Photography

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You don’t have to spend lots of money just so that you can get organized. There are many inexpensive items you can use to help you organize your life. Save your hard earned money for something else more worth while. Here is a list of 10 inexpensive items you need to make life organized:

1.  Calendars – These are the number one item for keeping family and yourself organized. Mark down appointments and special dates.  These can easily be found in disocunt stores often for as little as $1.00.  If you want a particular calendar, like a Franklin Covey calendar, wait a week or so after the new year and you could get it at a discounted price. If you have a computer and printer, you can even print your own blank calendars from the internet.

2.  Timers – My timer is my best friend. It helps me not to waste time when I am doing things around the house. Set your timer for fifteen minutes and spend that time de-cluttering, cleaning, or organizing.  You’ll be amazed at how much you can get done in a small amount of time if you work hard during that time. It keeps you focused cause you know you only have a set time to complete your task.

3.  File folders/Labels – You don’t have to have a large filing system for it to work for you; plan on having just enough files to store and be able to locate important papers for finances, insurances, health, utilities, credit cards, warranties, or anything else you can think of.

4.  Index cards – I love using index cards because you can use them for a variety of things like: shopping lists, goals, recipes, menu planning, frequently used telephone numbers. Also, they are small and easy to stick in your purse or put on your desk so you can always find and use them. I sometimes assign a color or index card to a specific purpose like: green for shopping lists, pink for recipes and white for to-do lists.

5.  Cork Board -  This is a great way to keep all your important notes in one place. You can use them for keeping up with to-do lists, shopping lists, and any number of other important notes and reminders.  They help corral papers, and keep notes where you can find them instead of being tucked away in a drawer some place in your house.

6.  3-Ring Binders – The 3-ring binder comes in different widths to be able to hold different amounts of paper.  This is a good alternative to a filing cabinet in your home. You could have 3-ring binders for each category and store everything on a shelf instead.  You can purchase these at a discount especially during Back-to-School sales.

7.  Totes and Bins – These come in all shapes and sizes and materials materials: like  wood, plastic, fabric, metal, or glass.  You can find some with lids and some that don’t have any lids.  Prices may vary but are these are great for storing and organizing. Try looking for them in discount stores or garage sales.

8.  Cereal boxes – An almost free item that you can easily transform into paper storage. Cut off one corner of the box, cover with contact or wrapping paper, and use them for storing magazines. You can keep your kids busy by having them decorate the cereal box. You can also use this to store your kid’s papers that they bring home from school. Each week or when the box gets full, you and your child can go through it and toss the papers that you no longer need. This teaches you kids how to be organized too.

9.  Baskets -  These are wonderful holders for so many different things.  Organize crafts that youre working on, wash cloths or towels in a bathroom, fruit, or any other number of things can be kept in baskets to help keep things neat and tidy.

10.  Boxes - If you are storing items in an area that won’t get wet, you may be able to save money organizing by using boxes that you can get in your local grocery store.  You really do not have to spend money on boxes when you can get them for free. Just make sure to label the outside so you know what is inside the box without having to open it up.

Why spend a great deal of money to get organized? There is no need for that. These ten inexpensive items will help you get organized and won’t break your budget.  Come to think of it, there maybe are other items around your home that you can repurpose for organizing.  Take a look-see and you may be surprised at what you find.

About the Author:

Marie Ynami loves to blog about topics that interest moms. You can find more of her blog posts at Mommy Community .

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photo credit: Sarah G…

This isn’t the fun part.

This is the “What the heck was I thinking?!” part.

The opening the pickle jar in the middle of the grocery store NOW lest someone get HURT part.

The gagging when your beloved husband tries to kiss you part.

The everything tastes nasty and turns to sand in your mouth part.

The eating every hour to avoid vomiting part.

The holding your nose when you cook/clean/do laundry/smell anything part.

The napping and arising so tired part.

The peeing all night part.

The brushing your teeth in stages to minimize the gagging part.

The “I could moonlight as a Hound Dog” part.

This is the bit that comes before the feeling the kicking part.

And before the hearing the heartbeat part.

And the cute maternity clothes shopping part.

Ugh.

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Our topic?

Detoxification.

Detox is a buzz word but the concept is certainly not new, and there are many approaches to detoxification that are appropriate for everyone.

How do you know you need to detox?

A few signs of the body not eliminating waste properly: dandruff, psoriasis, acne, dry skin, ezcema, fatigue, headaches, poor digestion, constipation.

This interview will explain what a “nutritional cleanse” is and tell you which foods produce congestion in the body. You will also learn:

• Why detoxification is necessary and beneficial
• Signs your body needs to detoxify
• Who should not go on a cleanse
• How to find a health care practitioner who can guide you through a cleanse

More info on this site about detoxification:

The Detox Bath

photo credit: tallkev

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Well, Halloween is over and the Thanksgiving Holiday just can’t wait to get here. After Thanksgiving, Christmas will creep in sooner than you think and then it’s time to celebrate the New Year. With the holidays so close together, people try to look for ways to make the holiday celebrations more frugal.

How can you save on holiday celebration costs but still be able to present yummy dishes for your family to enjoy?  Here are a few tips that can help you cut the total amount of your food bill for any holiday celebration.

First, you must decide how much money you’re willing to spend on each person who will be dining with you.  A reasonable estimate for the meal would be to spend around $10 per person and not feel like you’re serving just coffee and cookies.

When you go to the grocery store, purchase items that are in season.  If turkeys are a really good price, and you have the room to store them, get a two so you can use them over the next couple of months.  Don’t be afraid to stock up on staples that you know will be used.  Try your best not to buy items that will only be used on a certain holiday.

If you can, try to make as much of the food from scratch.  Convenience foods like pie shells, biscuit mixes, and stuffing may save time, but they are expensive.  If you are making pumpkin pie, try baking a pumpkin, and use the meat of it to make your pies.  You’ll be surprised to hear your guests tell you how yummy it is.

If you have some time before hand, prepare the things in advance rather than waiting until the day of (for example; Thanksgiving Day or Christmas Day)  to do so.  Bake a few pies ahead of time or several dozen cookies to keep you from having to rush on the day of the feast.

If money is tight, don’t be ashamed to ask for help.  There’s nothing wrong with guests bringing an item or two to share.  Potluck can be fun! Just because youre hosting the party in your place does not mean that you should have to prepare everything.  Put a menu together and ask people which items they are willing to bring.

You can reduce your cost by serving a vegetarian meal instead of a huge turkey to feed 20 people.  You not only save money but you’ll also save time as vegetarian meals don’t take as long to cook.  There’s a possibility too that you won’t have all the leftovers to store and eat over the next week.

Even though using disposable plates, napkins, and cutlery would make clean-up easier, it also makes the day more expensive.  It shouldn’t take more than a dishwasher load or two to get all the dishes cleaned up.  Of course, larger items like the turkey roaster will need to be washed by hands.  Tablecloths, napkins, and dishtowels may all fit into one washer load.

If you choose to have a centerpiece, look for natural items that you can use to create one. Pumpkins, gourds, pinecones, pine boughs, and fall flowers can make beautiful tablescapes and they cost little to nothing.

It is possible to have a frugal holiday celebration and still have a great time. Try to remember that it is the memories we make with our loved ones that is more important.

About the Author:

Marie Ynami loves to blog about topics that interest moms. You can find more of her blog posts at Mommy Community .

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Decrease Pain and Inflammation Safely, with Ingredients Found In Your Own Kitchen Cabinet

By ChicagoHealers.com Practitioner, Dr. Steven Arculeo, DC

“Each year, use of NSAIDs (Non-Steroidal Anti-Inflammatory Drugs), account for an estimated 7,600 deaths and 76,000 hospitalizations in the United States.”

(NSAIDs include aspirin, ibuprofen, naproxen, diclofenac, ketoprofen, and tiaprofenic acid.)

(1) Although promoted as safe, when taken for long term basis, they been show to cause damage to the digestive track, kidneys, liver and other vital organs(2) (Robyn Tamblyn, PhD).

Many individuals are looking for natural alternatives to reduce pain and inflammation without the damaging effects of these drugs. These drugs just treat symptoms and ignore the causes of pain and inflammation. To truly improve ones health above ones symptoms, you must first find the cause and build your treatment from there.

Inflammation is a natural response of the body but if you are in a chronic state of inflammation it can cause pain in your joints and tissues. Inflammation can also cause many physical and neurological diseases, including heart disease. One of the biggest factors that causes inflammation is diet. Depending on what you eat you may be contributing to increased inflammation in your body.

Most everyone utilizes a kitchen whether they cook elaborate meals, grab something to go or heat something up in the Microwave. But could your kitchen be setting you up for pain and sickness?

Foods that cause inflammation in the body are

1. Hydrogenated or Trans Fats
2. Processed foods
3. Caffeine
4. Red Meat
5. Sugar
6. Soda
7. Alcohol

Instead, fill your kitchen with fruits, vegetables, lean meats and cooking ingredients which can decrease inflammation and rid yourself of sickness and pain:
* Apples & Blueberries: these fruits are packed full of nutrients and are natural anti-inflammatories

* Kale: contains over 80 nutrients per serving

* Fish: one of the most powerful anti-inflammatory foods, fish contains heart healthy and anti-inflammatory Omega-3 fatty acids. Choose cod, salmon or tilapia instead of the fatty deep water bottom dweller fish such as shrimp or catfish

* Ginger: aids in digestion

* Garlic: lowers hypertension and cholesterol

* Basil, Parsley, Rosemary, Turmeric, Thyme, Chili Peppers & Cinnamon: all are proven to have anti-inflammatory properties

* Oil: use cold pressed extra virgin olive oil to aid in decreasing inflammation

By eliminating the inflammatory foods and adding these anti-inflammatory foods to your diet you will be on your way to decreasing the inflammation of your body and riding yourself of sickness and pain.

ChicagoHealers.com Practitioner Dr. Steve Arculeo, DC

References:

1. Robyn Tamblyn, PhD; Laeora Berkson, MD, MHPE, FRCPC; W. Dale Jauphinee, MD, FRCPC; David Gayton, MD, PhD, FRCPC; Roland Grad, MD, MSc; Allen Huang, MD, FRCPC; Lisa Isaac, PhD; Peter McLeod, MD, FRCPC; and Linda Snell, MD, MHPE, FRCPC, “Unnecessary Prescribing of NSAIDs and the Management of NSAID-Related Gastropathy in Medical Practice,” Annals of Internal Medicine (Washington, DC: American College of Physicians, 1997), September 15, 1997, 127:429-438, from the web at , last accessed Feb. 14, 2001, citing Fries, JF, “Assessing and understanding patient risk,” Scandinavian Journal of Rheumatology Supplement, 1992;92:21-4.
2. Renal Effects of nonselective NSAIDs and Coxibs, Mathew R. Weir, MD, Cleveland Clinic Journal Of Medicine.
3. http://eating.health.com/2008/02/21/anti-inflammatories-the-new-superfoods/2/
4. http://nutrition.about.com/od/dietsformedicaldisorders/a/antiinflamfood.htm

photo credit: Shootingsnow

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Vitamin D promotes your immune system, and your body needs vitamin D in ample quantities to provide  protection against microbial invaders like bacteria and viruses (including the H1N1 ‘swine flu’ virus).

Are you a good host (to disease), or a bad one?

Recent studies show that as many as 87% of adults are vitamin D deficient by late winter, and 61% remain deficient even during summer months.

My guest this week is Steven V. Joyal, MD, Vice President of Scientific Affairs at the Life Extension Foundation

Did you know these facts about Vitamin D?

• It benefits cardiovascular function
• Women with higher blood levels of Vitamin D have reduced breast cancer.
• Vitamin D also helps prostate issues
• Vitamin D is not a vitamin! (explained in the interview)
• Current levels of supplementation frequently recommended (such as the RDA) are inadequate – listen to find out what is the proper dose.
• 30 minutes of sun exposure at noon = 10,000 i.u. Vitamin D.
• Learn about a safe and healthy level of sun exposure.

Carrie’s favorite source of Vitamin D:  Nordic Naturals – Lemon Flavored Arctic-D Cod Liver Oil

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Plug in, switch on, use.  Simple right?  But what about after we’ve used our vacuums?  What happens to all the stuff we just picked up off the floor – or better yet, what did we pick up off the floor?

Many of us go further still with this bad habit – not only are we unaware of what we’re cleaning, we’re unaware that we’ve left a pile of dirt sitting and festering in our vacuum, and in our home.  If we consider the fact that vacuums don’t have an air tight seal preventing picked up particles from floating back out, we begin to start seeing the importance of realizing what’s living inside our vacuums.

To find out what’s living inside your vacuums, you have to start by looking at what’s on the surface.  And if you start thinking back to people and pet traffic, food spills, and odors – we start seeing what a scary picture this really is.

What’s Living in Your Carpet?

Your carpet is not as clean as you’d like to think. Even on an otherwise clean and healthy looking carpet, a close up microscopic view of the surface would show legions of bacteria and micro-organisms scouring your carpet.  If you start thinking about all the ways you use your carpet, you start seeing how troubling this can be.

We enjoy our carpets by lying on it, our children play on it, your belongings fall or rest on it.  Nearly everything in your home touches (or will touch) the carpet at some point.  Now we begin to see the importance of a clean carpet.

Scientists observe that even in carpets without any reported damage, there is the very real possibility of indoor fungal growth.  They determine this by the amount of carbon dioxide released into the air by micro-organisms living in your furnishings.  Simply, they breathe, they release carbon dioxide, and high amounts of repeated releases can result in indoor fungus.

So how can scientists figure out the respiration rate of tiny microscopic beings?  Quite simply actually.  Scientists can extract dust from the carpet surface and test it to arrive at a pretty accurate estimate of the number of micro-organisms based on the respiration rate evident in the dust.

In one study, scientists analyzed these organisms by sprinkling dust samples on a special filter.  The result of this test “revealed 18 species were living in the carpets.”  Their findings also showed a frightening similarity between what’s crawling around in your carpet and what’s crawling around in soil samples.

Additionally, “the rate of respiration showed that the fungal species detected were living in the furnishings, and were highly metabolically active.”

What does this mean?  This means that fungal micro-organisms can grow in your home even if your home has no moisture damage, has average indoor air moisture, and has no other traditional problem-causing situations.

So now you know – bacteria, fleas, mold, and other microscopic organisms can all thrive in your carpet.  But the number one thing that every home has is dust…and with dust come the notorious dust mites.

What is Dust?

Even the cleanest home has dust.  The National Institute of Standards and Technology has even come up with a very scientific term for this: “standard house dust”.  And yet, even with this basic element in every home, scientists stress the importance of home dwellers to realize that even this ’standard house dust’ can be host to harmful chemicals.

In collaboration with the E.P.A, scientists collected dust from vacuum cleaner bags in home, hotels/motels and at cleaning services.  With a sample of collection from several states, scientists then filtered and analyzed the samples with test results confirming a minimum of 33 harmful toxins.  Another test into this matter revealed over 80 harmful chemicals.

Clearly, tests are showing that there are harmful contaminants living in your carpets and then transferred to your vacuum cleaner – where many of us leave them to thrive multiply and escape back into the air.  So what exactly is in dust that is a living breathing invader?  Dust mites.

What are dust mites?

The dust mites are microorganisms living on the dust particles.  They eat mainly dead human skin cells.  And considering that dead human skin cells comprises about 70% of all household dust, we quickly begin to see how we’re creating an environment in which dust mites can thrive freely.

If we take in the respiratory rate, and the fact that in our vacuum we’ve clumped both mites and food supply in lock stock barrel, we begin to realize the hazards of not cleaning out our vacuums.

How dust mites make you sick

Many people believe they have an allergic reaction to dust.  However, the truth of the matter is that it isn’t so much the dust or dust mites you’re allergic to. The thing your sinuses are rattling in response to are dust mite excrements. Dust mites produce ridiculous amount of droppings.  Considering they live up to 15 weeks, dust mites can produce up to 300 their weight in bodily waste.

Their by products are so small, that these excrements end up being part of the in-house air.  It is this dust-mite excrement air that you’re then breathing into your lungs and having strong allergic reactions to.

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When most people think of energy efficiency, they think of turning of the lights when you’re not using them, or they think of automobiles with a high mpg ratio.  But what about the appliances we do use when we use them?  How much energy are they consuming and how effective are they?  And perhaps the most important question is:  Can I get an environmentally-friendly vacuum that still is powerful enough to get the job done?

The answer is “Yes!”.  You can have the metaphorical cake and eat it too, and with so many ‘green’ vacuums being stylishly designed, not only will you be doing your part, but you’ll look good doing it.

Green Vacuums

When getting a ‘green vacuum’, there are a few things you want to consider, such as what are the amps? An “amp” is simply an abbreviation for “ampere”, which is a standard unit of electrical current.  A good figure for a green vacuum is 12 amps.  If you decide to go with a green vacuum, you’ll find plenty with low amp rating.  Ideally, you should be looking for a range of between 4 and 12.  Once that’s done, the next thing you want to do is start comparing additional features.  The additional features will really See the guide below to get an idea for what kind of features you can get with your next vacuum.

4 Amps with HEPA – The Royal MRY6500 upright vacuum cleaner is great for someone looking to go below the 12 Amp benchmark.  The HEPA filter removes up to 99.07% of dust and allergens 0.3 microns or larger, making this vacuum perfect for allergy or asthma sufferers. It’s high-impact plastic body, Gore-Tex outer bag, and ergonomically-designed metal handle, makes this commercial upright vacuum extremely durable.  Weighing less than 10 lbs, it’s large capacity disposable paper bag makes maintenance a breeze.  A double row ball-bearing brush makes this 4 amp wonder not only efficient but effective.

5 Amps with CRI Green Label Certification – The Sanitaire SC678 Commercial Upright Vacuum is a heavy-duty, lightweight vacuum with an allergen filtration.  Having received a Green Label Certification, the Sanitaire features Arm & Hammer dust bags that are ideal for high frequency use.  In addition to catching fine particles of dust and other microbes, Arm & Hammer dust bags help eliminate odors caused by bacteria and mold.  The Sanitaire also comes with a 1 year warranty.

7 Amps with CRI Green Label Certification – As a Green Label Certified Vacuum, the Sanitaire SC888 provides a premium filtration level and an allergen filtration.  It should be noted that this more of a commercial vacuum cleaner.  Commercial vacuums need more strength and durability to clean places like hotels, schools, restaurants, offices, etc.  These types of vacuums are also able to withstand more punishment than a standard residential vacuum cleaner. Other than that, it has the same basic traits as the Sanitaire SC678 as far as featuring Arm & Hammer dust bags. But if you’re looking for a vacuum for contractor sites, then consider the Sanitaire SC883.

12 Amps with HEPA Filtration – The Bissel 82G7-1 Momentum Cyclonic upright vacuum cleaner provides continuous suction with seven surface settings.  In addition to being energy efficient, it has a TurboBrush feature so you can clean multiple surfaces, such as carpet, bare floors, upholstery, auto and stairs.  It also boasts a single cyclone separation system and an air flow indicator filtration system with a HEPA media Filter.

12 Amps with Airetight® HEPA System – The Bissell 5770 includes Multi-Cyclonic Technology and Microban Antibacterial Protection that make sure bacteria, mold and mildew do not grow in the vacuum. The Airetight HEPA Filtration System of the Bissell 5770 makes sure you’re protected from 99.9% of pet dander and 100% from dust mites, pollen, ragweed and mold spores.

12 Amps with Full Bag Sensor – Hoover’s U5140900 Tempo wide-path upright vacuum cleaner makes it easy to get rid of all that dust, hair and debris. Many people prefer vacuums with bags over bagless ones, since the latter often release that debris into the air when you try and empty them out.  While bagless vacuums make it easier to know when the bag’s filled, the Temp has a “full bag” sensor that takes care of this for you – and, unlike bagless vacuums, there are no filters to constantly be cleaning. Hoover’s Tempo also has a filter that traps 99.9% of dust mites, ragweed and common grass pollens.

In addition to these, there are at least 20 more ‘Green Vacuums’ that range in use, price, amps, and features. Hopefully this introduction to eco-friendly vacuums will get you started off on the right foot and well on your way to doing your part for energy conservation.

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Dr. Wolk-Weiss is a Chiropractor and author of Ten Commandments for a Healthy Lifestyle.

We’re talking about NAET (Allergy Elimination Technique).

Let’s face it, allergies are a pain.

Avoiding foods and other substances that cause reactions is time consuming and frustrating.

NAET utilizes acupressure to retrain the brain to not overreact to allergens.

NAET is not painful and can be done even on babies. While it’s impossible to say exactly how many treatment sessions a patient will need, typical scenario is 6-12 sessions,  making NAET less expensive than a life of allergy suffering!

Dr. Perry shares stories of individuals whose lifestyles have dramatically changed because of their allergies resolving thanks to NAET.

Read about NAET and its founder: Naet: Say Good-Bye to Your Allergies

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September 22^nd, 2009 marks the autumnal equinox – the official first day of autumn.  The morning was marked with a heavy blanket of fog over the city streets and a crisp thin veil of ice on the windows.

Fall is officially here, and not a moment too soon after an incredibly scorching summer. Shifting gears, any eco-savvy person knows that a whole new set of rules come into play once the season begins its cold long descent into winter.

While normally aware of Mother Nature inspired do’s and don’ts, I have to admit my guilty winter pleasure has to be the fireplace.  Fireplaces are a terrible eco-gremlin, not only using burning natural resources, but release smoke and fumes into your home and atmosphere. Fortunately, there are a few things we can do to make sure our fireplace use is as green as possible.

Understanding Your Fireplace:

Many people think that there are ways to use a conventional fireplace so that it’s as eco-friendly as possible.  Some of these so-called “green” choice include using woods such as birch, hickory, sugar maple, and red oak to produce more heat and less smoke.

But the truth is, switching out one type of wood for another is still use of a natural resource that otherwise could have been spared. The act of switching out one type of wood for another does nothing to reduce deforestation.

The use of a conventional fireplace still leads to harmful smoke, fumes and other indoor air pollutants – definitely something to consider if you have pets or children.  Traditional open fireplaces burn very inefficiently and produce hundreds of chemical compounds, including carbon monoxide, organic gases, particulates, and some of the same cancer-causing agents found in tobacco smoke.

Minor spillage of these pollutants occurs regularly, primarily when starting or stoking the fire. However, the larger concern is when the fire smolders late at night, producing high levels of CO and a weak draft that is dangerous and sometimes even fatal. ¹

The Smart Fireplace:

Whether or not you have a fireplace, you can still create the same effect with faux fireplace that doubles as an energy-efficient heater.  A fireplace heater lets you fill your home with a mesmerizing, soft glow without the hassle of burning ash and buying wood.

Conventional fireplace are often limited to a large home that can accommodate the space and chimney necessary to install a traditional fireplace.  With an electric fireplace heater, it’s possible to have a fireplace no matter what size or type of home you’re in.

Electric fireplace heaters are perfect if you live in a small home or apartment and prefer the stylish addition of a fireplace.  Fireplace heaters make it possible for these types of spaces to still enjoy the warm glow of a fireplace.

The look of an electric fireplace heater is surprisingly realistic since it includes light bulbs to simulate the gentle smoldering of a fire down to the glowing embers.  With portable fireplace heaters, you can get the coveted architectural element of a fireplace, without the cost – plus its portability allows you to move it whenever you decide to rearrange your décor.

Green Fireplaces is brought to you by Shireen Qudosi.  For additional eco winter ideas, visit http://www.air-n-water.com

1    Best Practices Guide to Residential Construction, by Steven Bliss. John Wiley & Sons,    2006. ISBN-10: 0471648361, ISBN-13: 978-0471648369, Hardcover: 320 pages

Images 1: iStockphoto.com

Image 2: http://blogs.worldbank.org

Image 3: http://www.casasugar.com

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Many people automatically feel tense when the topic of home birth is brought up. This is due in part to the fact that so many people in our culture believe that the only “safe” place to birth is in the hospital.

photo credit: eyeliam

The truth is that for healthy women having normal, uncomplicated pregnancies, home birth is safer for mom and baby.

Home births are becoming more mainstream in the States for a number of reasons. Some celebrities are known for their choice to birth at home, which is great because it leads to more publicity. Home birth is not an extreme, “out there” choice. It’s a choice that women from all walks of life are making as the best choice for themselves and their babies.

Let’s take a look at 13 benefits of home birth.

1. Safety. I already mentioned this earlier, but much of the research on home births has found that infant and mortality rates are a little bit better in a home birth. There’s less chance of c-sections, induced labor or the use of forceps, as well as other interventions that often have unintended negative consequences.

Another safety issue is that of baby being separated from mom. While we don’t hear about these cases often, babies do get switched at birth when they go to hospital nurseries. They also sometimes get bottles and pacifiers (sabotaging early breastfeeding efforts) or have their cries ignored when they are separated from mom and dad.

2. Stress. It’s widely accepted that a home birth is significantly less stressful for the mother. Instead of having to ride (horribly uncomfortable when you’re in labor!) to a hospital, you get to seamlessly labor then birth in the comfort of home. This effect is not to be quickly disregarded.

Stress makes labor more difficult and births more dangerous. Adrenaline inhibits labor. This is why so many women find that their contractions level off when they go to the hospital – the body feels stressed out and decides it’s not the right time to labor.

Also stressful is having to leave the hospital and drive home with a new baby. With home birth, you are free to relax in your own bed for as long as you feel comfortable. No nail-biting drive home from the hospital, secretly cursing every other car on the road!

3. Family. A home birth means you can have whomever you want in the room with you. Hospitals usually have strict policies about the number of people you can have around.

My children (as well as parents and two midwives) were in the home during my home births. My parents were able to share in the experience of welcoming their new grandchild into the world and were extremely helpful with my other children while I labored.

My children who observed a younger sibling being born have a very normal, healthy concept of what birth is really like. Unlike popular media images, they didn’t see a woman out of control with her legs up in the air, screaming and verbally abusing her husband and the people around her.

They saw me working very hard to do something… and then there was a baby.

4. Choices. A home birth means you can walk around, make a sandwich, listen to music, watch television, cook, do housework, etc…. or do whatever you feel like doing while you’re in early labor. (Once you’re in heavy labor you usually can’t focus on anything else but what you’re doing!) Hospital rooms are much more restrictive.

Yet this activity helps move the baby along in the birth canal and keeps you from feeling overwhelmed and tired out by hours of laboring. It distracts you and takes your mind off of the early pains that don’t really need much attention. It passes the time. During my last birth, I bounced on a medicine ball listening to Patsy Cline croon at me. Both of these things felt extremely comfortable. Later I crawled around on the floor like a crab. This also helped me deal with labor pains. Not to mention the “liquid epidural” that is the birth pool!

5. Comfort. A home birth allows you to give birth in whatever position you feel most comfortable in. The old “on your back with your feet in the stirrups” is horribly uncomfortable and does nothing to help a woman birth comfortably.

For my 3 home births, I was sitting up and squatting on a birthing stool. It was far more comfortable than my hospital birth, which had me semi-reclined in a hospital bed (no coincidence, this was the only birth that resulted in a perineal tear!).

6. Nourishment. A home birth means you can eat and drink whatever you desire. Hospitals generally restrict you from eating. Not only is there little evidence to support this practice, but it can also lead to hypoglycemia in mom and baby, both of whom are working extremely hard to birth, often for several hours.

7. Control. A home birth means no intervention – for you or baby – without your permission. Hospitals often tell you what they’re doing about halfway through the procedure when it’s too late to tell them you don’t want pitocin and you don’t want that IV stuck into the back of your hand.

Hospitals, due to litigation, often make rules that do not serve individuals, just to protect themselves. (”CYA”) No woman would choose to have a fetal heart monitor continually strapped to her body, inhibiting her movement, during labor. And there is no evidence to prove that such constant monitoring leads to better outcomes for moms and babies! It’s just CYA.

8. Bonding. A home birth means you can bond with your baby immediately without them being whisked away to be washed (unnecessary) and swaddled (also unnecessary). You can count baby toes and fingers, kiss and hold and fall in love with your baby. This is also an ideal time for the first breastfeeding.

9. Breastfeeding. Home birth and breastfeeding are a match made in heaven. Childbirth and breastfeeding are more intimately connected than many realize. The early days of breastfeeding are easier and far more cozy when a mom has given birth and recuperated at home.

10. Midwives. A home birth means you will likely use a midwife and that experience alone is enough for many women to choose home birth. Midwives tend to have a more personal approach to childbirth and their patients. They take far more time with their clients than Doctors and Certified Nurse Midwives do (the average appointment time is an hour, not 7 minutes!). Midwives stay with you during your entire intense labor experience, and for several hours afterward, to help you establish breastfeeding, clean up your home, make sure you’ve showered and eaten (if that’s what you choose), and perform the newborn’s first exam.

11. Home. Finally, a home birth allows you to recover from childbirth in the comfort of your own home. If you’ve ever been in the hospital, even if it’s for a wonderful reason like childbirth, then you know first hand that it’s not a fun place to be. Home is much better, surrounded by familiar things and familiar people.

12. Dad. Home birth makes Dad a more prominent figure in the birth. Dads are often perceived as a nuisance or something to tolerate in the birthing room at a hospital, but his presence is very important at home. He may be rubbing mom’s back, keeping her birth tub full of warm water, fetching water/juice/snacks, mopping sweat from her brow, etc.

They also are more in control of what their baby experiences in its first moments and hours of life. Dads sometimes feel misplaced by the “alpha” person in the room – the Doctor or CNM. During a home birth, a midwife doesn’t feel this way about the father of the baby. In fact, his skills may be employed to help the baby out – the same activities that put the baby in may be needed to naturally augment labor (I’ll let you use your imagination here!).

photo credit: eyeliam

13. Pride. Home birthing moms tend to be a proud bunch. Having natural childbirth makes you feel amazing about yourself as a woman.  “I did that“…while the midwife is there to make helpful suggestions and in case of emergencies (midwifes are trained as well as equipped to deal with many of these at home and recognize the signs of trouble early enough for mom to transport to the hospital safely), with home birth it’s the “you, you and you” show. Many times mothers are the first ones to touch their newborn, it’s often their own hands that guide baby out of the womb and into the world.

For those of you who have experienced the benefits of home birth, did I leave anything out? What did you see as some of the greatest benefits?

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Several months ago I got a personalized story book for my then 7 year old son.

He loved it, so I was tickled when the folks at Frecklebox offered me a personalized coloring book for my 6 year old daughter.

Ilana loves coloring books and devours them regularly, so I knew she would be stoked to have one that has her name on every page!

She’s in First grade and is learning to read more and more each day, and seeing her name in print is fun for her.  It seems that every kid’s favorite word to write, spell and read is their name.  The coloring book immediately captured her attention and she hasn’t lost interest in reading it again and again.

I’ve also noticed that kids love to put their names on things they own. If you have kids with uncommon names and/or unusual spellings like I do, you can rarely find them little trinkets with their names on them.

Frecklebox also offers personalized lunch boxes, stickers, journals, puzzles, and a lot more stuff.

Neat huh?

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My guest this week is Nora Coffey, president of the HERS Foundation.

Nora was a guest on the show about a year ago. You can listen to that interview here. Now she joins us again to talk about her new book  (co-authored with Rick Schweikert).

The H Word: The diagnostic studies to evaluate symptoms, alternatives in treatment, and coping with the aftereffects of hysterectomy.

If you think you don’t need to listen to this interview because noone is telling you to get a hysterectomy (castration) right now, I respectfully disagree.

Every woman should inform herself NOW before she’s faced with the decision.

photo credit: cliff1066™

After talking with Nora these two times, reading her book and from my own life hearing stories of women and their experience with hysterectomy (castration), I am convinced that there is a dreadful LACK of appreciation and understanding of the purpose of the female organs – on the part of medical professionals and we women ourselves.

The H Word tells you why hysterectomy is so commonly recommended, the diagnostic studies that should be performed first to evaluate suspect diagnoses, the treatment alternatives that exist, the benefits and risks of those treatments, and probably most importantly – the lifelong functions of the uterus and ovaries, and the lifelong consequences of their removal (castration).

I urge you to listen to this interview and spread the word amongst women you care about!

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photo credit: Roebot

All Infant Formula Contains Fluoride at Tooth-Discoloring Levels

New York – October 21, 2009 – All infant formulas, whether ready-to-feed, concentrated or organic, contain fluoride at levels which can discolor developing teeth, reports the October 2009 Journal of the American Dental Association (JADA) (1).

Fluoride, added to some bottled and public water supplies ostensibly to prevent cavities, is also in many foods and beverages, including infant formula. Excessive fluoride discolors and/or weakens permanent teeth (moderate fluorosis).

Researchers measured fluoride content of 49 infant formulas.  See:
http://www.freewebs.com/fluoridation/infantformulafluoride.htm

The research team concludes, “Most infants from birth to age 12
months who consume predominantly powdered and liquid concentrate formula are likely to exceed the upper tolerable limit [of fluoride] if the formula is reconstituted with optimally fluoridated water (0.7 – 1.2 ppm).”

Surprisingly, the study reveals that all 6-month-olds and younger will also exceed the lower “adequate intake” (0.01 mg/day) from all formulas concentrated or not) risking moderate dental fluorosis from formula, alone. (2)

Breast milk contains about 250 times less fluoride than “optimally”uoridated water and isn’t linked to fluorosis.

“Babies don’t need fluoride and fluoride ingestion doesn’t reduce tooth decay,” says attorney Paul Beeber, President, New York State Coalition Opposed to Fluoridation, Inc. “So why are US babies still exposed to unnecessary fluoride chemicals via the water and food supplies and why aren’t parents informed of the consequences?” asks Beeber.

Up to 48% of school children have fluorosed teeth – 4% severe, reports the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) (3).

Both the CDC and the American Dental Association’s web sites advise parents to avoid mixing fluoridated water into concentrated infant formula, but they have never effectively broadcast this information to parents or the media (4,5).

A review of human studies by different researchers published in JADA (July 2009) concluded, “Our systematic review indicated that the consumption of infant formula [concentrated and ready-to-feed] is, on average, associated with an increased risk of developing at least some detectable level of enamel fluorosis.” (6)

“Parents, protect your children since dental and government agencies won’t. Petition local and state legislators to stop adding unnecessary and harmful fluoride chemicals into public water supplies and, thereby, into our food supply,” says Beeber. “Further, demand that the fluoride content of all food products be required on labels.”

Researchers agree that infant formula levels should be lowered.

“One interpretation of the available evidence would be that public health officials should create guidelines for infant formula consumption ensuring that the upper intake level established by the Institute of Medicine… is not
exceeded. Another approach would be to strive for ‘biological normality’ and to strive for fluoride levels observed in breast milk,” write Hujoel et al. in “Infant Formula and Enamel Fluorosis: A Systematic Review. (6)

A recent investigation by the Environmental Working Group (EWG) found that over-exposure to fluoride among infants is a widespread problem in most major American cities. EWG’s study found that, on any given day, up to 60% of formula-fed babies in US cities were exceeding the Institute of Medicine’s “upper tolerable” limit for fluoride. (6a)

In 2004, fluoride researcher Dr. Teresa A. Marshall told Reuters Health, “Very young infants are unlikely to benefit from the caries-prevention effects of fluoride…They may be at increased risk of dental fluorosis.” (7) Marshall co-authored “Associations between Intakes of Fluoride from Beverages during Infancy and Dental Fluorosis of Primary Teeth,” in the Journal of American Clinical Nutrition. (b)

In 2000, researcher A K Mascarenhas evaluating only well-conducted studies from the 1980s through the 1990s concluded in Pediatric Dentistry that infant formula was a major risk factor for dental fluorosis. (8)

As part of the on-going Iowa Fluoride Study, Levy and his team measured the fluoride content of infant formula and found from 0.15 to 0.30 ppm in ready-to-feed infant formula. (9)

Common household water filters (e.g. carbon filters) do not remove fluoride and unlike chlorine, which dissipates upon boiling, fluoride becomes more concentrated when water is boiled.

USDA: Fluoride-content of common foods: http://www.ars.usda.gov/Services/docs.htm?docid=6312

Pictures of fluorosis
http://www.fluoridealert.org/health/teeth/fluorosis/moderate-severe.html
Contact: Paul Beeber, Esq 516-433-8882 nyscof@aol.com

SOURCE: New York State Coalition Opposed to Fluoridation, Inc.
http://www.orgsites.com/ny/nyscof
http://www.FluorideAction.Net

References:

1) “Assessing a potential risk factor for enamel fluorosis: a
preliminary evaluation of fluoride content in infant formulas,”
Journal of the American Dental Association October 2009

2) http://fluoridation.webs.com/intakefromformula.htm

3) http://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/figures/s403a1t23.gif

4) http://www.cdc.gov/fluoridation/safety/infant_formula.htm

5) http://www.ada.org/prof/resources/pubs/adanews/adanewsarticle.asp?art…

6) “Infant Formula and Enamel Fluorosis: A Systematic Review,”
Journal of the American Dental Association by Hujoel, et al, July 2009

6a) “National Academy Calls for Lowering Fluoride Limits in Tap
Water,” EWG News Release, March 2006 http://www.ewg.org/node/21000

7) “Too Much Fluoride May Harm Babies’ Teeth,” Reuters Health, May 5,
2004
http://www.fluoridealert.org/media/2004c.html

Pediatric Dentistry. July-August 2000. “Risk factors for dental
fluorosis: a review of the recent literature,” by Mascarenhas AK
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/10969430?dopt=Abstract

9) Dental Clinics of North America 47(2003), “Current and future role
of fluoride in nutrition,” by Warren & Levy, 225-243

More evidence that infant formula is linked to dental fluorosis:

http://tinyurl.com/AllFormulaContainsFluoride

More: Carrie’s Interview with Bill Osmunson DDS, MPH, and Fluoride Action Network Spokesperson on the risks of fluoride.

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I got a chance to try out some of the Belli skin care here and published a review.

This time I got my hands (and legs!) on the All Day Moisture Body Lotion.

And as I wrote previously,

“The nice thing about these products is that they are free of synthetic dyes, phthalates and paraben preservatives, and the Belli Motherhood line is LactMed screened to avoid ingredients that may be questionable during breastfeeding.”

The All Day Moisture Lotion has lemon oil and so smells like a slice of lemon cream pie heaven.

The folks at Belli are letting me give away a gift set to a reader!

This one is called the Motherhood Essentials Kit.

It includes: Pure Comfort Nursing Cream, Eye Brightening Cream, Body Firming Serum and Moisturizing Hand Sanitizer.

To win, simply leave your name, a valid email and a comment below.

A winner will be randomly chosen on Wednesday, October 28 at Noon (Eastern).

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While they’re probably not terribly harmful for your hair,  silicone has to go through a lot of chemical processing for use in hair care products which leaves a big eco footprint. Some people also notice build up if they use products containing silicones frequently. They also tend to be expensive.

If you’re looking for a way to have naturally shiny hair, here are a few ideas:

Honey.

Honey not only smells wonderful,  it’s also a powerful humectant (meaning is draws moisture from the air), so it’s a nice moisturizer for your skin and hair.

It will leave your hair shiny and silky. Add a few drops of honey to your hair after washing, allow to soak in, and rinse away.
photo credit: ATKR / Stryker W@SP

Apple Cider Vinegar.

Vinegar is fantastic for putting shine into the hair. Simply pour a little ACV onto your hair after shampooing and rinse away with cool water.

Coffee.

Coffee is also great for shine, especially for brunettes obviously. Add half a cup of cooled strong coffee to your hair after shampooing and rinse away with cold water.

Olive oil.

If your hair is very dry olive oil can really help it. It will nourish the dry hair and also leave it shiny and silky. Add a few drops of warm olive oil to towel dried hair and leave in for 20 minutes to an hour. Then rinse with cold water.

Coconut Oil.

This is one of my favorite hair care tips. I rub a little coconut oil into my damp hair after shampooing and comb it through with a wide tooth comb. My extra dry, curly hair has never been shinier!

Less Shampooing.

Shampooing a little less frequently (you may be able to get away with once a week if your scalp isn’t greasy) can lead to shinier hair. Rinsing your scalp thoroughly every day (such as when you exercise or get sweaty) is usually adequate.

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Just yesterday I read an article about “Generation X” – it stated that parents who raised GenX kids were the first to try to be their children’s friend.

Even though I believe in attachment/gentle parenting, I still firmly believe that it’s in my best interests to be a parent, not a buddy to my kids.

That doesn’t mean we don’t have a close relationship, or that my children cannot confide in me.

It means that my kids need me to be an authority figure, not a peer.

I think this article has some good points. I do not agree with point #1 – I find that cosleeping has nothing to do with discipline. Sadly, I recognize a couple of these signs in my oldest child, who tends to be a bit manipulative at times.

Let me know what you think.

10 Signs that the Parent-Child Boundary Is Blurred

By Dr. David Swanson, Psy.D.

You would love to think that your kids not only love you, but also like you—that they think you’re “cool” and consider you a friend. The problem is, when you blur the line between being your child’s parent and being his friend, your child is likely to use a manipulative technique I call “Forging the Friendship” in order to get what he wants.

Forging the Friendship is the strategy with which your child tries to turn you into his friend, thereby breaking down the power structure that should exist. When you revert from parent to friend, it’s much harder for you to say no.

Children who employ this manipulative strategy are understandably unaware of the dysfunction between themselves and their parents. They may fall into this role because they take emotional care of a parent or because the parent shares inappropriate information with them, such as details of a dispute with a spouse, or financial worries.

In my practice, divorced parents are most at risk for blurred parent-child boundaries for several reasons: (1) they fear losing their child’s respect or love; (2) they don’t want to be viewed as the “bad” parent, or (3) they’re lonely and in need of a friend or confidant.

Psychologists call a child who is forced to take on the responsibilities of her parent or caregiver a “parentified child.” Here are 10 signs to watch out for:

1. Parent and child sleeping in the same bed.

2. A child actively defying his parent or using such inappropriate language as, “Oh please, you’re only saying that because he’s here. You know when we get home, you’re not going to follow through.”

3. A child referring to his parent as “cool.”

4. A child who behaves as though he is much more adultlike than is age appropriate, or uses language such as “those kids” when referring to peers.

5. Children saying their parents “let me get away with whatever I want.”

6. Children reporting their parents are easy to manipulate.

7. Parents reporting that they often need permission from their child.

8. Parents setting few or no limits or boundaries.

9. Parents wanting to have fun with their child but never imposing consequences for inappropriate behavior, lest they “ruin the time they spend together.”

10. Parents seeking advice and guidance from their child in such a way that places the child in the caretaker role.

Do you have a parentified child? Here are some ways to reestablish your authority.

If your child badgers you for more information, say, about what led to your divorce or how much money you make, simply tell her it’s not an appropriate topic of conversation.

If you normally go to your child for comfort after a bad day, or when you’re feeling lonely or depressed, make an effort to seek help and solace from someone outside the house—a friend, counselor, or family member.

Remember, also, that it’s perfectly okay to tell your child that you’ve made some parenting mistakes, but from here forward there will be new rules and limits. Be prepared for emotional pushback. If your child tells you you’re not cool anymore and you’re acting like a parent, accept this as a compliment!

* * * * *

David Swanson, Psy.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in children and teens suffering from ADHD, oppositional and defiant behavior, anxiety, depression, and social problems. His new book is Help! My Kid Is Driving Me Crazy: The 17 Ways Kids Manipulate Their Parents and What You Can Do About It (Perigee, Sept. 2009). You can learn more about him at www.DrDavidSwanson.com.

See Also:

Gentle Discipline for the Older Child

What is Gentle Discipline?

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photo credit: diongillard

And those used tea bags can be used for several good purposes.

Here are some ideas on what to do with all those leftover tea bags.

(This post makes me feel very Tightwad Gazette-ish! If you’ve never read the books, I highly recommend them for ideas and inspiration on how to re-use things that would otherwise be discarded.)

Uses For Used Tea Bags

Compost.

This one’s fairly obvious, but used tea bags make wonderful compost for your garden. Simply add them to your compost heap and let nature takes its course.

Under eye cosmetic.

Used tea bags can be cooled and placed on the eyes for a wonderful soothing relaxant.  If your skin is irritated, try chamomile. If you have bags and puffiness, try something with caffeine (like black tea), as the caffeine will  help shrink the tissues (many of the over the counter depuffer products for eyes contain caffeine).  I throw my used tea bags in the fridge in a bowl and keep them just for this purpose.

Cool sun burns.

Peppermint tea bags are great for sunburns because the menthol has a cooling effect on the skin. (Ever noticed how it hurts to drink water after eating an Altoid? Yeah.)  Leave tea bags to cool then place the bags on the burnt areas.

Use on cuts.

Used tea bags are also great on cuts and bruises. You can use any variety but green tea, peppermint and chamomile have good soothing qualities.  Some claim that used tea bags are also good for bee stings and other insect bites.

Decaf.

photo credit: House Of Sims

Did you know that if you reuse a tea bag, the second cup is decaf?

Now you do.

Many times you will hardly notice any change in flavor when you put fresh hot water on a used tea bag.

Got any other uses for used tea bags? Leave them in the comments below!

p.s. You can shop online for tea here.

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Egads.
photo credit: feverblue

Just reading the labels on those things makes me sick!

Partially hydrogenated oils (loaded with trans fats) almost always top the list.

Besides, it’s easy and cheaper to flavor your own coffee using healthier, natural ingredients. Here are a few ideas.

Flavor Your Coffee Naturally

Vanilla

Vanilla beans will add a lovely aroma to your coffee. Try adding a small drop of pure organic vanilla extract to your cup of coffee. And using cream mixed infused with a natural vanilla pod is also nice. Buy whole vanilla pods at the health food store where you get bulk herbs, and steep them in cream overnight.

Cinnamon

A simple way to do this is to dip a few whole cinnamon sticks into a large pot of coffee and leave to infuse for 5 minutes.  Or, grind a cinnamon stick into your whole beans. The downside to this method is that your coffee grinder will have the flavor of cinnamon until you clean it well, maybe even after. And of course, it’s easy enough to simply shake ground cinnamon into your own cup.
Nutmeg

A friend of mine from the Dominican Republic likes freshly ground nutmeg in her coffee. It imparts a lovely flavor. Use one of those tiny nutmeg graters, and just grind a little into your cup.

Ever notice those little shaker bottles at Starbucks? They have vanilla powder, ground cinnamon, chocolate powder and ground nutmeg in them. Especially nice on top of freshly steamed/frothy milk.

Dried orange peel

Place the dried orange peel in a pot of water and boil for a few minutes. Then sieve the water into your coffee pot and use this orange water to make the coffee.  Also nice in hot tea.

Chocolate

Making your own cafe mocha is easy enough. Simply make a simple chocolate syrup by mixing cocoa powder, a little water, and a little sweetener of choice. Cook this on the stove for a bit, then use to taste in strongly brewed coffee. Top with hot milk and you have a mocha without the hefty price tag.

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photo credit: dslrninja

What Are Excitotoxins?

Just as it sounds, excitotoxins “excite” the body tissues, starting with the tongue (wow! that tastes good! want more!) – but not in a good way.  Many of us think of “Chinese restaurant syndrome” and MSG (monosodium glutamates) when we hear the word.

Glutamates exist naturally in some natural, healthy foods but your body is able to handle those without problems. During certain processes (for instance the refining of foods) these are turned into “free glutamates” that do damage to the body.  Sadly, even “organic/natural” foods that are highly processed can contain these excitotoxins.

Mindy’s free worksheet with more information on excitotoxins and how to avoid them is available here:  Nourish Your Children

Mentioned on the show:

- The Weston A. Price Foundation

To win a copy of Mindy’s ebook:

Simply leave a comment below (with a valid email address so I can contact you). The winner will be chosen and notified on Wednesday, October 21 at NOON Eastern time.

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——-> Win a $100 Whole Foods Market Gift Card!

As part of its “Be Good to Your Whole Body” campaign, for the month of October, Whole Foods Market has created podcasts focusing on maintaining a healthy mood.

As the seasons change, these simple, free tips, consider how conscious breathing, herbs, and eating well, can help maintain a healthy mood.
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I came across this great article with ideas on how to reuse these so they don’t end up in the trash can straightaway:

20 Creative Uses for Plastic Grocery Bags

While some of these are fairly obvious and thing you’re probably doing already (like using them for small trash can liners, and for dirty laundry on trips, etc), some are unique to me, such as:

• 5. Army man toy parachute
• 8. Shower cap
• 9. Stuffing for Toys or Pillows
• 10. Reuse Bags at the Grocery Store (my favorite grocery store here locally has a spot for recycling these in case you forget your reusable bags)

I would also add to this list:

• Emergency cloth diaper cover. Once while I was away from home with a young baby who was in cloth diapers who had soiled the cover, I fashioned a quick diaper cover out of a plastic bag. It’ll do in a pinch.

The entire site is worth perusing and following if you’re into couponing and saving money – and who isn’t, these days?

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