This is Benjamin’s home birth story, as told by his Mom’s doula.
Benjamin’s Home Birth Story
So, let me tell you about the day you were born.
I remember clearly the beautiful sun. It was what is called a crisp morning. Slightly cool, but clear and an outside kind of day.
Your mother called me around 7:00 am and told me it was time to go and they would meet me at the hospital. As I was driving, I got another call from your mom saying they were having a hard time finding a sitter for your brother and sisters so I went to your house instead to get your mom myself!
When I arrived, your mom was obviously working very hard. SHe would stop and concentrate, swaying and leaning on a door frame during the contractions. She was still bvery much in control, getting things ready to leave. On the long drive to the hospital, we listend to Sunday Morning Praise on the radio and joked about the birth. When we got into downtown, we stopped at a redlight and I rolled my window down so we could hear the beautiful cathedral bells announcing Mass. It was a picture perfect morning.
I parked at the entrance of the maternity hospital and we walked in. When we entered the labor hall, yur mom had a pretty big contraction and she felt her water break! I was squeezing her hips and she was leaning against the wall when she told me she felt it break. We got to the admissions desk and got right into our room. We had been in this room before :O) because we had already been to the hospital twice! You decided to have a really long warm up that sent us to the hospital thinking your mom was in active labor when it would turn out she was still in very early labor. The very night before, when we had made our second trip to the hospital, your mom was very discouraged. She was so tired from not sleeping well and taking care of your family and she jsut wanted to hold you so badly. When we arrived the nurse told us she was only 2-3 cm dilated and that we needed to go back home, YOur mom was very upset and the wonderful nurse told her that if she stayed in the hospital they would have togive her drugs to GET into active labor. Well, that was out of the question as your mother really wanted and had prepared for a natural childbirth. She did lots and lots of research and reading and mentally preparing herself for your birth and she wanted to welcome you into this world naturally.
I decided that your parents needed a break so I gave them a gift card to a restaurant and told them that since they already had a sitter, they should go out for dinner and enjoy these last few hours of alone time they would praobably have for a while!
I told them to talk about when they first met and NOT to talk about the labor. They needed to relax and have some fun and stop worrying about when you would be born. I thought it was funny that yourmom went into active labor that very night!
So, this time your mom was obviously in labor and when the nurse checked her and announced 7-8 cm your mom let out a great big WOOOO!!!!!! HOOOOO!!!!!! I’M NOT GOING HOME THIS TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nope, I thought, not without Ben! Well we settled in and I began to do alot of hip squeezing to help releive the labor pains. Your mother labored beautifully. She listened to her body and worked with what it was telling her to do.Your dad was right by her side the entire time. I had showed him some comfort techniques the night before and he jumped right in.I also had a new doula with me that was helping out and it was a good thing!
Your moms contractions were very strong and she tried so hard to relax through them. I would squeeze her hips and your dad was holding her hand and we whispered in her ear that she was doing a great job. WE encouraged her to keep working , that she was almost done and you were almost here. Dr. LAwson came in and suggested that we try the birth ball to get the last bit of cervix out of the way but about that time, your mom was asking me what it felt like to push. I told her she would probably start to feel little grutny urges at the tops of the contractions and she nodded yes, she felt it. I told her to just follow what her body told her. I could her her hold her breath and push just a little at the height of the contractions for a few minutes until she started to say she REALLY needed to push! At this time I was kneeling on the side of the bed talking and encouraging while she held your dads hand and pushed. I moved around to hold her leg up and she would give another big push. At one really intense point she looked straight at me and her eyes locked on mine. It was almost like I was holding the universe for her, so I said firmly “YOU, LOOK OVERE THERE!!” and I opoint my finger to your dad, she turned her head very suddenly and locked her eyes on your dad. That was where she needed to be looking because he needed to pour love into her to help her through these last really strong moments of birth.
Dr. Lawson was watching and your mom pushed with all her might!! They were good, strong pushes and after just a few, I saw the top of your sweet little head beginn to show. Another push and I could see a bit more until finally the top of your head was born and we could see your precious face! One more big push and out you came! All wet and pink and just beautiful. Your mom said ” I DID IT< I GOT MY VBAC!” Yes, she did and it was a beautiful labor and birth.
You went directly to your mothers chest and looked around quietly, examining your new surroundings. You were very awake and aware and content to stay right there, soaking in the warmth and love and smell of your mommy. She nurtured you as you grew inside her and you just knew she wa the one you had heard and the one that loves you.
After a while, you went to the warmer and your dad got to really check you out. They weighed and measured you and your dad put on your first diaper. He was so gentle with you, telling you it was ok, and that you are loved. You came back to mom and nursed right away. It took just a very few minutes for you to get the hang of it then off you went, happily nursing all that goodness from your nmom, made especially for you! You were not seperated from your parents and you got to ride in your sling with your mom up to your room! This was a really great birth. You are a very lucky little boy to have the parents you have. You have one of the best moms I know and your dad is so loving and gentle with your family. I think that growing up , you will learn from watching your mom haow to nurture a family and from your dad you will learn to be a great man.
It was an honor for me to be an invited guest at your birth. I am so pleased that your mom got to have the birth experience that she wanted, worked for and deserved. I hope she will be able to cherish these memories forever and I am sure she will share it with you!
I was your parents doula. I helped her to achieve this experience and in return got to be blessed by seeing you born. I will never forget Mr. Benjamin Thomas Roche or your family. You will always hold a special place in my heart.
Mother to Mother Doula